Is there something i forgot?
I can't believe i posted nothing about IPM!
Well that's what happens if you are stupid enough to book out your agenda with meetings the instant you set foot back into the country. And still try to keep some semblance of a social life with a significant other.
So anyway, what an unforgettable conference. I use that word very deliberately. I don't think the emotions, ideas, friendships or atmosphere experienced will ever be thrown together again in my life?
How could one conference be so calm and yet so chaotic? So challenging and yet to unfulfilling? So exciting and yet so boring at times? How could i find so much time to lament the unclarity of my future, and yet find no time at all to write an sms to my boyfriend?
Strange things these conferences. And if i had a pound for every time i faced the question 'So, why are YOU not standing for AI?'... (the tone varied, sometimes accusing, sometimes confused, sometimes frustrated, sometimes barely interested at all, but the expectation for a well thought-out answer was always the same. Strange at the time i considered my answer to be more well-rehearsed than well thought-through. Still, seeing my previous post this evening there would appear to be some truth in it...
So we are back on the 'what to do next' trail. Maybe i shouldn't be in such a hurry to leave @. This huge, magical, seductive world where people believe anything is possible. And it usually is. Maybe there is still something there for me. Am i too old? I guess recent history suggests not? DO i still have the passion? UNdoubtedly yes? Do i still have the time to invest...?
Now there's an interesting question... I finished my studies 3 years ago. SO are all these 'memorable experiences' helping to make me an employer's dream, or simply unemployable? Do i actually want to be 'employed'? Can one dream of employing oneseof without academic or professional grounding in one area?
All very interesting questions to the neutral observer. But to the central character in this mystery, they are imposing gates that prevent any movement, except round in circles. They are frustrating reminders of the fact that he still does not know where he wants to be ultimately. And of course all this rattling at the gate only to beat a retreat is causing discomfort to more than just himself.
So who has the keys to the gate? No, who knows which gate to open?
You see, fun isn't it...?
Well that's what happens if you are stupid enough to book out your agenda with meetings the instant you set foot back into the country. And still try to keep some semblance of a social life with a significant other.
So anyway, what an unforgettable conference. I use that word very deliberately. I don't think the emotions, ideas, friendships or atmosphere experienced will ever be thrown together again in my life?
How could one conference be so calm and yet so chaotic? So challenging and yet to unfulfilling? So exciting and yet so boring at times? How could i find so much time to lament the unclarity of my future, and yet find no time at all to write an sms to my boyfriend?
Strange things these conferences. And if i had a pound for every time i faced the question 'So, why are YOU not standing for AI?'... (the tone varied, sometimes accusing, sometimes confused, sometimes frustrated, sometimes barely interested at all, but the expectation for a well thought-out answer was always the same. Strange at the time i considered my answer to be more well-rehearsed than well thought-through. Still, seeing my previous post this evening there would appear to be some truth in it...
So we are back on the 'what to do next' trail. Maybe i shouldn't be in such a hurry to leave @. This huge, magical, seductive world where people believe anything is possible. And it usually is. Maybe there is still something there for me. Am i too old? I guess recent history suggests not? DO i still have the passion? UNdoubtedly yes? Do i still have the time to invest...?
Now there's an interesting question... I finished my studies 3 years ago. SO are all these 'memorable experiences' helping to make me an employer's dream, or simply unemployable? Do i actually want to be 'employed'? Can one dream of employing oneseof without academic or professional grounding in one area?
All very interesting questions to the neutral observer. But to the central character in this mystery, they are imposing gates that prevent any movement, except round in circles. They are frustrating reminders of the fact that he still does not know where he wants to be ultimately. And of course all this rattling at the gate only to beat a retreat is causing discomfort to more than just himself.
So who has the keys to the gate? No, who knows which gate to open?
You see, fun isn't it...?
posted by Rob at
10:26 PM
3 Comments:
i wont comment on the content of your post because it is so personal that i don't have the right to say anything and second whatever one could say it would most probably be wrong.
i assume that you know by yourself that you need some days off.
all the best
yavor
about the question on which gate to open - I suggest an evening with LOTS of red wine. It usually does the trick for me ...:-)
That's an invitation to my place, btw...:-)
big hugs,
Caro
hehe - i was thinking the same, but then realized that it's possible for @ers to think about something other than AI. Good Luck with whatever you do! :)
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